It’s a done deal. The awards we’ve all been waiting for…I mean you can pretend the BAFTAs or the SAGs or the BRITs are interesting but you’re fooling NO-ONE, this is where it’s at…The Oscars. It all went down last night people, and even though we pretty much knew who was going to win, we had no idea what the birds were going to wear…until now. Look, someone’s gotta come clean, it wasn’t great…nothing AMAZING, well maybe one or two, but overall, meh.

I think you’ll agree. Where’s the drama, the gasp-inducing dresses, the “I never eat a freaking thing and work out like a demon, so here is my body and be envious you little people” outfits??? *sigh*

Yawn. Seen this look on you a few times now Charlize, new balls please.

I do not understand what is happening here, why are we being shown her belly? Why? And the hair is way too severe, she’s like a confused Robert Palmer backing singer.

A classic case of believing anything your stylist tells you. HorRENdous.Mutton, meet lamb, she’s wearing your dress.

Everyone else is going mad for this number on Cate but I’m not digging it. The colour is blah and it’s way too fussy. She looks great, but something in the dress just doesn’t work.

Kate Winslet continues her penchant for wearing THE WORST inventions on the planet. But there’s Leo so really who cares…Leo……..starts to daydream, bear with me…………………………

but if I insert myself in this pic instead of Kate,

Yep, that’s the look you want to get from the boy.

Ahem.

Sorry, sorry… back on it and I should start being a bit nice, right? It’s not all bad.

I like this. Very mermaidy and slinky. AWFUL necklace choice mind you.

COOOL. And different, love that. Good ol Gaga, always going off on her own fashion yellow brick road.

She’s done well here. And the back is even better.

Ooooooooooh! Sizzling. And green too, g’wan Saoirse, giving the homeland the nod.

Very pretty and gorgeous floral applique detailing. Love the trail at the back also, but Giuliana…it’s time to hit the buffet love, WAY too skinny melinks. Treat yourself to a bag of chips now and then.

A few undecideds (??, you know what I mean!!) now…

The bottom half is beautiful and all flowy and girly and awards ceremony nail hit on the head, but then there is the terrible belt situation and seen it a thousand times top half. Nice colour though.

Okay so she is in the family way which I know all too well is a difficult time in the style stakes, but this is just a bit too much on the twee side. Top marks for the clutch.

LOONEY TOONS. But somehow in an awesome way…fair play to her, mad hair and choker situation however. Still though, good work.

And finally, for me, two hotties in a shot, my husband and some guy called Tom.

He’s like a fine wine right?

And with that I bid you adieu. Oscar and out. (snigger)